Creationism

“If people came from monkeys, how come there are still monkeys?”

“If evolution makes us better and better, why do we get cancer?”

The crocoduck

“The theory of evolution violates the second law of thermodynamics.”

“The complexity of life we see today on earth could not have arisen from random chance alone.”

“We find so many fossils due to so many animals being killed during a global flood that occurred 4,000 years ago.”

“Evolutionary theory is not testable.”

“The Grand Canyon resulted from a massive, global flood that occurred 4,000 years ago.”

“Evolution is just a theory.”

“Do you really want to believe a monkey is your great grandfather?”

This bullshit.

Son of a bitch. They say the brain does not feel pain, but when I hear and read some of the horse shit that flies out of the mouths of creationists, I begin to question that claim. I find the fact that so many Americans believe in creationism almost as hard to believe as creationism itself. 

A portion of fundies have committed themselves to fight for the teaching of creationism in public schools as an alternative to the theory of evolution. “Teach the controversy!” the god damn fools proclaim.

Well, assholes, I have a news flash for you: there is no controversy. Let me say this again for the sake of emphasis. THERE IS NO FUCKING CONTROVERSY. When 99.9% of all scientists across all fields of study agree that the theory of evolution is the best and most supported explanation for how we came to be and that alternative explanations have thus far not brought forth any valid data that was not pulled out of some prick’s ass, we can safely conclude that no controversy on the issue exists. And no controversy on this issue will ever exist unless someone brings something quite new, radical, and substantiated to the table. 

But, why does it matter anyway? Some people believe it really doesn’t matter how people believe we came to be, and they leave it at that. I can see how one can come to that conclusion. Why waste energy fighting about what happened billions of years ago? Does it matter? Is it worth the trouble? Hell yeah, it matters. It matters a lot. If 99.9% of all scientists believe that a theory is the god damn backbone of the entire fucking field of biology, and half of American citizens reject that same theory, it speaks to the lack of trust and confidence in the scientific community. That lack of trust and confidence matters because evolutionary theory isn’t the only thing the scientific community is chugging out. It also chugs out medicine. And a hell of a lot of people need medication.

Now, before you launch your campaign against big pharma, I will be transparent and admit I evaluate all claims from big pharma with a good dose of skepticism. Yet, while I do not condone having blind faith in anything, I do, for the most part, trust the medical community…at least on the big stuff that has been around for quite some time. Sure, sometimes big pharma pulls some fucking bullshit like hiding data so they can push a medication out to the market and get the dollars rolling into their already big ass pockets, but there are always other researchers standing by to check these bastards out. Scientists replicate studies. And when an idea is tested multiple times and the data that results is inconsistent, they realize something is up and research it even more. The truth eventually comes out. Science is a self correcting process.

In other words, yeah, we have certainly experienced isolated incidents in which dishonesty in research caused harm to others, but we have never seen a vast conspiracy that involved almost the entire field of medicine. Thus, some distrust in treatments that are new is legitimate. But, these cocksuckers running around declaring global conspiracies are full of shit. You can find douchebags in every group, and the scientific community is no exception. But, by and large, scientists don’t do research for money. They do research because they are good intentioned people that want to know the truth. 

When people believe otherwise, bad things happen. The anti-vaccine movement is a good example of this. We’ve got kids getting serious and preventable illnesses, even dying from these avoidable illnesses, because their parents are a bunch of dumbasses that think vaccines are extraordinarily dangerous and that people will do better without them. Then, when their kids get tetanus or other terrible diseases, they can do nothing but sit by and watch the disaster they created for their child unfold. But, they don’t only put their own children at risk. They put other people at risk, too. Some children cannot receive vaccinations because they have an allergy to a component in the vaccine or they suffer from a compromised immune system, so the vaccines will not work for them. These kids depend on others to become vaccinated so they won’t spread these diseases to them. 

We had all but eradicated these diseases, but they have since made a triumphant return thanks to this asinine movement. What drives these morons forward? Ignorance. Unfounded distrust. The inability to understand the difference between a peer reviewed journal and a blog. Some people believe that academic research means typing in Google.com and going from there. Fucking idiots. 

Do you see the connection here? When we doubt something as well founded as evolution, that same stupidity can be applied in other circumstances that are dangerous. It is important to know what people are talking about. It’s important to know what the fuck is going on. Innocent babies and children have died due to peope’s failure to get a god damn clue. And that fucking matters.

I will be spending the next several posts addressing each of the asinine statements listed above. It would be far too overwheming for both readers and myself to address all of those statments in a single post. As this blog develops, you will find occasional creationist articles peppered throughout along with my response to the shit heads that wrote them. I just can’t fucking help myself. I welcome anyone to add their responses to the articles or offer their challenges to my rebuttal in the comments as I build this blog.

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